I came to a realization for 2006, when you give your life fully to God things always work themselves out. Last year I didn't wait for God to work in my life. I pursued what I thought was for me. I pursued relationships and friendships that weren't beneficial to my life. Surrounded myself with the wrong people because I thought I needed them in my life. Thought my life wouldn't be complete without these people. In the end they caused me stress and pain. But after I learned my lesson God cleaned them out of my life. I can now look back on 2005 as a learning experience. Failed friendships showed me how to be more cautious about the people I surround myself with and it strengthened my appreciation for the wonderful friends I was already blessed with. Rocky relationships taught me not to chase after what God didn't prepare for me. I also know now not to settle for anything less than what I deserve, which is to be treated as a queen. As for love on the whole, I've learned to appreciate those who already love me, keep my heart open for those who may grow to love me, and not to allow my heart to be torn apart by those who never loved me at all. So for 2006 I'm waiting on the lord. Instead of acting on what I want to do, I'm gonna wait and let him work in my life.

Just to show how great God is:

This Christmas I set my heart to have the first enjoyable Christmas I've had in years. I prayed that the lord would grant me the joys of the holiday, and I had the best Christmas I could ever ask for. I enjoyed my family in a way I never thought possible.

After my last heartache I told the lord I was handing my love life over to him. I asked him to send me the man he had set out for me and help me to appreciate him when I get him. When I wasn't even looking for anyone to come into my life the lord placed someone in my life who treated me the way I'd always wanted to be treated. The lord even moved all the obstacles that were in our way so that we would be able to be together.

In my job I had one employee that seemed to live for the purpose of making everyone else's life difficult. I prayed for the strength to ignore their antics and not allow them to cause me to lose my job. I went away on vacation and when I returned I was told that that employee was being transferred to another department.

Now that I've started to really put my life in the hands of the lord, my life isn't perfect, it's not stress free, and things don't always work the way I want them to work, but its so much easier dealing with the hardships that come up when I know in my heart the lord always works things out for me.

So for 2006 my plan is to continue to pray and let him work through my life.